Foreigners

20 September, 13

M*A*S*H was one of my favorite shows growing up. I thought of it more as a comedy, along the lines of Laverne and Shirley or Happy Days, being too young and cloistered to appreciate some of the more serious anti-war, feminism and equality messages. Major Burns was always my favorite to watch. He was so stupid and inept, and somehow got Hot Lips and the second highest rank on base. Some things never change.

One of his best lines was, "I hate all these foreigners!", speaking of course about the Koreans. I think that is the way many people travel. On the benign side, people in another country are oddities to be observed, like pieces of art at a museum. "Oh, look Harold! Doesn't that old woman look so quaint? I'll bet she hasn't worn a new dress in 50 years." The more malignant version assumes everyone is the enemy, or at least that they are perpetually thinking about how to steal your money, watch, passport, etc. "You just can't trust these foreigners, Vicky. They're always looking for a way to suck you dry, like little parasites. They can smell an American from a mile away." Either way, our reality is warped by our preconceived notions of foreigners, even when we are the foreigners in somebody else's country.

I had a couple of experiences like this the other day. In Spain, they have "Chinese Stores". The stores are called things like "China" or "Super China". Very creative. It's where you go to buy cheap Chinese stuff. Since we have Wal-Mart, I have no built in biases against cheap Chinese stuff. The Spaniards, however, don't even like to walk in, as if they will be defiled by stepping foot in the place. The stores are even run by Chinese people, and you can't trust them. According to Julia, "All they want to do is take your money, and everything they sell is junk." She was wide-eyed with fear for our safety as we walked into the pit of hell right there on Calle Mayor in La Alberca. Somehow we survived.

Susan and I went on a similar shopping trip together yesterday. Susan has absolutely no fear of these Chinese bandits. She walks around the store like she owns the place. Nothing will get in the way of her desire to fill our home with worthless Chinese junk. I really admire her courage and pluck and swell with pride as I survey every bag of worthless Chinese junk she buys. She walked around with a shopping cart. I followed behind like a petulant child, pulling our little wheeled shopping bag that all old ladies in Spain use for going shopping. It looks like the redheaded stepchild of a wheeled golf bag. We were in Santo Angel, so there was a good chance I wouldn't run into anybody I knew.

Susan's first foray into the jungle was for makeup wipes for Elizabeth. That gave me an excuse to separate, as men are not allowed anywhere near the feminine products aisles. Just ask any guy, and he will tell you of the inherit dangers therein. I wandered aimlessly about the store, pulling my little bag behind me. Every now and then, I spotted one of the Chinese workers down the aisle, furtively looking at me, then moving on. After four or five times like this, I got the idea they thought I was stealing stuff and putting it in my bag. I even got into a staring contest with one of them. The very idea! This foreigner had the audacity to think that I would be stealing something, and I was in a Chinese store, where all they have is worthless junk anyway. I walked every aisle and touched everything. Stupid little foreigners.

I got a little taste of what it must be like to be an immigrant in the USA. All anybody wants to do is make a living for their family. We load up all these ideas about immigrants. They are dirty. They are illegal. They are drug-runners. They steal our jobs. They drain our economy and use our benefits. Stupid little foreigners. Maybe we need to see them as humans first, without labels. Maybe they have a story to tell that is worth hearing.