What's in Your Toolbox?

9 April, 2014

The other day I went out by myself on a hike. When I go with a friend, I don't feel the need to take anything with me, but when I go solo, all of sudden, I have a compulsion to take a backpack full of stuff:

• Long Pants
• Jacket
• Hat
• Water bottle
• Wallet
• Keys
• ID
• Leatherman

The Boy Scout in me comes out, and I need to carry stuff, just in case. Be prepared. I forgot a flashlight, however, so my total trek time was only about 1 hour. I also failed to bring along anything resembling a first aid kit. Looking back, I was not prepared for much more than what I actually accomplished--a fairly easy uphill stroll. The wallet came in handy, however, because I stopped at a new restaurant and enjoyed a few tapas and a couple of cervezas. Mission accomplished.

The only tool I brought along, my Leatherman, is really just a multi-faceted pacifier. I feel better having it strapped to my side. To be sure, I could find some uses for it on the trail, if pressed, but in truth, I am not much of an outdoorsman. I love being in the wild, but I don't know how long I would actually survive on my own. Going to a survival camp is on my Bucket List. (Hint for Christmas)

Tools and I go together like barbed wire and bare feet. No matter how careful I am, I always end up getting hurt. At this very moment, I am typing with a band-aid on my right thumb, after almost severing it with an apple slicer. I just am not safe around tools. Don't even get me started on anything with electricity.

This lack of dexterity weighs heavy on my soul. My entire family is handy. Everybody can make stuff, whether it's food, houses, robots, art, etc. I can make a mess, usually with some amount of blood loss in the mix. So what can I do to supplement my obvious lack? I am not really sure, but I think the answer is somewhere between resignation and perspiration.

On the one hand, I need to admit and accept my obvious shortcomings. Where my brother and sister can design, build and repair anything, I will just have to pay somebody else to do it. This is not such a bad way to go, however, as I get things done and then move on, perhaps a little poorer, but not nearly as tired.

On the other hand, I need to learn, grow and development. Like a muscle, I have allowed whatever shred of coordination I inherited to atrophy. It is time to bulk up. Living in Spain has actually helped a great deal with this, because I don't have a rolodex of available subcontractors at my disposal. I do however, have a Leatherman.

To date, I have successfully, more or less, repaired or replaced the following:

• Shower enclosure. Dismantled, caulked, reassembled. Still leaks, but the door opens better.
• Toilet guts. Removed and replaced. Toilet no longer runs constantly and flushes well.
• Ikea furniture. Okay, I actually helped Susan do this, so I only get partial credit.
• Art. I completed a 30 Day Challenge and drew some interesting things

That's not a very impressive list, but it is far more than I accomplished in the previous year. We all carry blindspots and weaknesses. Recognizing and working to overcome them is the challenge. 

Mosiacs and Restaurants

12 May, 2014

We have traveled extensively over the past year, which is an incredible privilege. One of the challenges, however, is finding a way to engage our daughters, who have become somewhat saturated with "another cathedral" or "another museum". It makes me a little angry to even say that. I mean, they should be more appreciative of what they're getting, right? Whatever. Teenagers are the same all over the world.

One way of combatting teenage boredom on our vacations is to engage them in some family activity. Lately it has been art. In Barcelona, we attended a workshop with artist Martin Brown. He is actually British, but has been living in Spain for several years. He is a full time artist and has amazing talent. You can see pictures of some of his work on this post. I will also link to his website.

Martin creates incredible mosaics and hosts classes right in his little apartment. It was a real treat to be able to sit down with him and design a mosaic, while he watched over the process. Each person worked independently, using a box full of tile shards of various shapes and sizes.

We all hunkered down to our tasks and chatted with Martin along the way. He is an amiable guy who fell into mosaics after a pretty successful career as a textile designer in the fashion world.

After two hours, that felt like two minutes, we each had a little mosaic to take home with us. Of course, Susan and Katherine made some incredible pieces. Elizabeth's was very nice as well. Mine? Well, I completed the project. In the "everybody gets a medal" kind of way, I'm a winner too.

Truthfully, it was one of the funnest things we did in Barcelona, along with taking pictures of funny sounding restaurants, which has become another staple of our travels. Really the two go together in a weird, mosaic kind of way. All the experiences we have shared have served to shape and define our family. Each moment together is another piece that combines to make a whole. Our lives are nothing more than a composite of tiny little seconds. We must choose wisely how we place them in the framework of time.

Who wants a plate of pipin' hot dukey?

Bugs. It's what's for dinner.

I'll have the barf on brie, please. Oh and a wedge of vomit, if you don't mind.

United Nations In My Belly

6 May, 2014

Now it's no secret to those who know me that I love to eat. It is with great joy that I thank God above for endowing me with an unreasonably high metabolism, enabling me to burn off more than I consume. This allows me to eat at will. In addition, my palette is incredibly wide. I will eat anything. Spicy, gross, hot, cold. I even recycled a piece of chewing gum off a roller coaster. It was mint flavored.

You can only imagine my sentiments when we visited the Camden Lock Market and other sites around London. Each location was awash with culinary treats from around the globe. It was a meeting to make the United Nations jealous.

India made the first presentation, a fiery fusillade of flavors that promised to overpower other, weaker nations. Brazil provided some modicum of peace, proclaiming a meat and potatoes message to appeal to the "Everyman". Thailand created a bridge between the hot words of India and the sweet language of diplomacy emanating from the Italian gelato. Germany preferred to stay rather neutral with its fare, but promised to come back tomorrow with more excitement. The Turks soothed with their creamy words of consolation, without sacrificing the flavor of their offerings.

Everything moved along apace, until the countries met in narrow confines, without borders, deep in the bowels of diplomacy. The Indian contingent set fire to the whole structure, which caused a mass exodus of blazing chaos. Not to worry, however, as this only cleared the way for fresh negotiations with other countries. Vietnam and Peru kept asking for a conference, while China insisted on a private meeting in its own section of London.

After four days of intense negotiations, we arrived at an accord.

• All agreed that London was the perfect place to hold a conference of nations, since the English have nothing to offer as far as food is concerned. This allowed each nation to have an equal voice, without competing for attention with the host country. 
• India is only allowed one meeting per visit, due to heightened fire safety concerns.
• Smaller countries should receive the first meetings, to ensure they have a voice.
• As a matter of practice, we must have more negotiations and more often. 

Perhaps my calling is as a diplomat, a gustatory ambassador of goodwill. Move over Dennis Rodman. Korea is calling my name.